Kid Rock: Hey, sorry you all thought I wasn’t kidding about running for Senate . . . oh, and vote for this guy

By Dan Calabrese

Since when do you have to apologize for trolling people in politics?

I think Kid Rock did us all a tremendous service by dropping obviously unserious hints about running for the U.S. Senate and then sitting back as everyone from the White House and many Republican governors took him seriously and offered him support. You want to know why we can never get anything done when we win majorities? Because this is how we pick our candidates.

But Kid Rock himself has actually taken a fairly serious look at the real candidates seeking to go up against Debbie Stab-Me-Now in the fall, and he’s made a thoughtful and rather curious choice for a guy – according to just about every journalist in Michigan – is a dyed-in-the-wool racist:

Last year, Kid Rock launched a Kid Rock For Senate website and sold campaign-themed merchandise. People wondered for months whether he was really serious until he announced in late October on The Howard Stern Show that it was all in jest.

“I’m not running for Senate. Are you kidding me?” he said on the show. “Who couldn’t figure that out? I’m releasing a new album. I’m going on tour too. Are you (kidding) me?”

James is hoping to challenge Democrat Debbie Stabenow in the general election this November but first, he must survive the primaries on Aug. 7.

Rock said that James would be the best person for the job because he would take care of the Great Lakes, fix potholes and bridges, and invest in education and Michigan’s security.

He also said: “I hope you’ll accept that apology, and I hope you’ll also trust me when I say I’m 100% here to endorse and do everything I can to make sure John James gets into the U.S. Senate.”

The aforementioned John James is pictured in the photo above. He’s a military veteran who espouses very conservative positions, and he’s going up against the more establishmentarian Sandy Pensler in the primary.

I could have sworn I read in the Detroit Free Press and elsewhere in the local media that Kid Rock is a vile racist, and that his concerts last year opening the new Little Caesars Arena in downtown Detroit should have been canceled for that reason. Racists don’t usually campaign for black candidates.

Of course, around here at CainHQ, we’ve gotten to know this routine from the left pretty well. Conservative blacks are even worse than conservative white people in the eyes of the left, because they’re Steppin’ Fetchits and Uncle Toms and House N—–s. It’s what they call our boss every day on Twitter. You’re only allowed to support liberal black people. If you support conservative blacks, you’re an even bigger racist than if you only supported whites! They’re like Manchurian Candidates, saying “yes massah” to the white power structure in exchange for three squares and permission to sit on the furniture in the plantation house.

So it turns out Kid Rock is an even bigger racist than ever! Why? Because he supports a black candidate, John James, for the United States Senate.

I just wanted to make sure you know how the rules work around here.

Dan writes Christian spiritual warfare novels and does all kinds of other weird things too. Follow all his activity by liking him on Facebook!